Harshi Pannala Q1 Blog #4 - Hufflepuff
My Hogwarts house is Hufflepuff! Its members are defined by their “hard work, patience, loyalty, and fairness.” To truly be able to be a part of this house, I worked very hard to hone these characteristics from the age of eight. I even took the test five times in four-month intervals to prove I belonged there, like anyone cared.
Whenever teachers asked me to describe myself, I put the same words on every form. I claimed these words. I represented these words. At least that’s what I told myself.
I am kind.
I am smart.
I am hard-working.
But the thing is, once people start describing you a certain way, it’s hard not to live within those boundaries. I built my personality around being the “nice” or “smart” one, so when people told me I was rude or lazy, it didn’t just feel like a mild criticism—it felt like they were dismantling who I was.
The worst part was realizing how quickly I believed the bad over the good. One comment could unravel years of confidence I had carefully stitched together. Second guessing the jokes I made, the texts I sent, or the smiles I forgot to show became a habit. If I forgot to hold the door open, I felt like I had committed a moral crime.
“Did my tone sound off?”
“Am I genuinely a bad person?”
I would lie awake wishing I could reverse what just happened—only I didn’t have Hermione’s Time-Turner. It is so exhausting, constantly monitoring myself, fearing an offhand comment could shatter everyone’s perception of me. Yet even in the wizarding world, Hufflepuffs weren’t known for perfection. They were admired for their compassion and stepping up when it mattered.
Perhaps I misunderstood the Sorting Hat’s message. The few words it offered me after the sorting test summed me up to an extent; however, they weren’t meant to be a cage. I wasn’t restricted to those characteristics every minute of the day. In retrospect, it is a bit odd I placed so much importance on being the model Hufflepuff. Who am I really letting down? The nonexistent sorting hat certainly doesn’t care.
I still proudly run around wearing my bright yellow Hufflepuff crewneck. I actually have no choice, since my parents paid way too much for it to just hang in my closet. The point is, I still identify with what it means to be a member of the Hufflepuff house, only now it isn’t my full-time job.
The sorting quiz: https://www.harrypotter.com/news/discover-your-hogwarts-house-on-wizarding-world
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ReplyDeleteHarshi, when I saw the title of your blog, I spit out my breakfast in excitement. I fell in LOVE, and I truly do mean love with the Harry Potter series at the age of six, I made my father sit through all of the movies, I poured over all the interviews, sorting hat quizzes (I always got Slytherin obviously), patronus quizzes (Mine's a snake funny enough) I even signed up for a paid account on the official Harry Potter website. I've made numerous trips to Universal Studios and plan to go again during winter break. But I completely relate to Harry Potter becoming the entirety of your identity. I used to try my best to embody the rude, better-than-thou attitude Draco wore like a mask. So I can understand questioning my identity, but I commend you for the vulnerability in your blog, as it is incredibly difficult to do. Thanks for sharing!
ReplyDeleteHarshi, let me just start off by saying that the Harry Potter references may have just made my day. If only we all had Hermione’s time-turner! She needed it for her classes; I think American needs to invent one too for us. I love your use of one sentence paragraphs, and in my humble opinion they have a very similar effect to the one-word paragraphs that Mrs. Smith encourages us to use! Your use of parallelism also really adds to your writing by emphasizing how deeply you embody the values you mentioned. I can totally relate to how one snide comment can make us feel worse and lead to lower confidence, and it does really take years to build up. I took the sorting hat test: it’s always really weird for me for some reason I got Ravenclaw and Gryffindor in different tries! On the topic of Harry Potter, I used to be (and still am) absolutely OBSESSED with the series when did you start it? I started with the books when I was 8 and the movies like a year later (call me weird but I prefer the books there’s so much more detail!) Overall, I could really see your growth as a person, transcending the values of Hufflepuff and understanding that they aren’t a cage, as you mentioned in your blog.
ReplyDeleteHarshi, Harry Potter was my childhood. I was so happy when I read your title for this week's blog. While I am not a Hufflepuff I am a Gryffindor I have lots of respect for Hufflepuffs because of their kind hearts and helpful nature. Even though we are from different houses I really relate to the point you brought up about adhering to the description of our houses and how that can become a huge part of our identity and sometimes can negatively impact our sense of self. While the sorting hat may seem like it knows every thing I feel that Rowling wrote the sorting hat in a way that left some ambiguity and space for us to interpret our own understandings of the message that it produced for us. I hope that you continue the mindset you now have of being a proud Hufflepuff without allowing the comments and observations of others to let that dismantle or affect the way you feel. Also I don't know about you but my favorite book is the Half-Blood Prince and I 100 percent love love love the books more than the movies. The movies were great don't get me wrong but theres something nostalgic about cozying up with the book in my blankets on a cold winter morning and just getting lost in the pages. What about you do you prefer the books or the movies?
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